Briggs recollected in her landmark 1971 book “Never in Anger,” about how calm and collected everyone was jarcontrast that created against her own unruly emotions. Even when some truly rage-worthy things happened like a teapot falling and smashing against floor the Inuit never betrayed a hint of anger. An “Emotional control is highly valued among Eskimos,” she wrote in the book. Indeed, maintenance of emotions under trying circumstances is essential sign of maturity, of adulthood.” Why so calm, she wondered? And more importantly, how can the rest of us get there? For the answer, Briggs looked to how children responded in difficult circumstances appeared to be something they learned from their parents. An simple parenting technique of Inuit is “Never scold child.” It became clear to Briggs when a young boy threw rock at her, related in a CBC interview, she didn’t berate him angrily, rather told him calmly it hurt. Instead of rage she told him real consequences of his actions caused her pain. Decades later, the writer Michaeleen Doucleff followed in Briggs’ footsteps in visiting Iqaluit, Canada, “in search of parenting wisdom. Said that teaching children to control their emotions is very important she writes in NPR. Doucleff found that a common strand among Inuit parents is: Across the board all mothers mentioned One Golden Rule: Don’t shout or yell at small children.”Among Inuit Arctic community Doucleff found the people practiced the theory that screaming at a child only teaches the child to scream. It is a vicious circle, the University of Pittsburgh researcher Ming-Te Wang noted in a 2013 study. “It is tough call for parents because it goes both ways: the problem behaviours of children create the desire to give harsh verbal discipline. That harsh discipline may push adolescents toward the same problem behaviours.” The Inuit society seems to have learned lessons long ago, and managed to break the cycle. And so “Traditional Inuit parenting incredibly is nurturing, gentle, tender,” as Doucleff writes. “If you took all parenting styles around the world and ranked them by their gentleness, Inuit approach would likely rank near the top.” What kind of children does that society produce? The kind who live harmoniously in world’s harshest climates often with threadbare resources. Survival hinges on making the most efficient use of natural world yet group still manages to be at peace with itself and with others. Maybe that’s because it’s also the kind of society that teaches kindness above all else. Jesus said do not let the sun radiate or set on your anger. Let it go for peace of mind.
The research is published in the journal Infant Behaviour and Development. The conflict of interest of the toy companies advertising children playing with many latest toys makes parents feel obliged to buy them for the children not to feel left out. Children display their toys online on social media to compare with each other including the addictive games that stop children learning, doing homework assignments later in college, university or focus at work. Lack attention span or focus from childhood affects the adults today unable concentrate for few hours to complete tasks at hand. Christmas is around and parents must not let a child manipulate them emotionally to buy a toy without teaching them first value of essential basic reading at level. Children can get a few educational toy to reward them to do exceptionally well in a field of academic achievement at school. The development steared towards a specific direction of any future career requires relevant toys to influence natural gifts, talents and abilities. Otherwise parents unintentionally make children victim of success by their ability to buy too many toys they can afford. Just because it is possible to buy things seen on the TV in adverts does not mean it enhances their specific development. Parent knows the children best, whether they are trained experts or not must help child learn not to depend only on school to learn. Early learning through practical play is now rapidly eroded by virtual reality keep children cocooned online. So important to carefully reflect before Christmas on piling up toys to “prove” your “love” of your children to the world overloading them with too many toys. Experience shows most children are just so happy playing with the box, not expensive toys boosting their parents ego. Millennium children are suffering from the lack of a social understanding or interaction due to isolated attachment to toys valued as more precious than engaging with each other. Time consumed worrying about their toy possessions makes them miss out on appreciating fellow human being as adults due to learned behaviour. The competition among children, teenagers over toys leads further to threats of the perceived anger of friends loving them only for their material possessions. The toys must not take over to babysit their children without adult supervision and input. One of the best ways to bond with children is play with them sometimes to help them value the adults in their lives.
Adele spotted her friend’s postpartum psychosis illness after the birth of her Godson. Postpartum is also a postnatal depression changing the behaviour of the mother after birth so needs help and support of friends and family to recover. This is a serious illness and mothers struggle to look after the baby and themselves. Adele’s best friend says the singer was the first one to spot her postpartum psychosis. Laura Dockrill gave birth to a baby boy, Adele’s Godson in February this year. Recognised it in me, while on the phone FaceTiming her and she was the first one to detect what she had, Laura told Radio 1 Newsbeat. This serious mental illness affects one in one thousand mums and can lead to hallucinations after giving birth. Laura said: “The last six months can only be described as hell, it was the worst time of my life.” She says her symptoms were “insomnia, delusions, suspiciousness and paranoia” and written a blog post to share her experiences with mums who going through same thing. Adele shared Laura’s story, describedas “intimate and heartbreaking.” The singer says she and Laura friends since they were teenagers and her song My Same, from the album 19, is about her. Laura is a poet, author, illustrator and short story writer, and she went to the same school as Adele – the Brit School of Performing Arts in Croydon. In a blog post she talks about a “horrific” labour her doctor believes might have triggered the illness. After coming home with son, Laura describes feeling like “pushed out my personality as well as a baby.”Laura and Adele are friends since they were teenagers. She says had suicidal thoughts. “I was begging my sister to let me go, I was begging my mum to let me go. “I have never had those thoughts before in my life and no history of mental illness, this completely took me by surprise and threw me against the rocks.” Laura says her skin went pale, she couldn’t eat or drink and she started getting severe anxiety attacks. As things got worse, Laura needed her partner Hugo to send her photos of herself with friends and family to remind her who she was. “Though postnatal depression and psychosis are treatable, even when my doctor said I would 100% recover I remember thinking, ‘Maybe others do but not me, this is me forever.”Symptoms of postpartum psychosis also includes delusions and hallucinations so Laura was hospitalised and spent two weeks away from her son. She describes herself as recovering more and more each day and is “happy, confident and strong” after getting support from family and a psychiatrist, as well as using medication. But she also says talking about her psychosis has been a “huge” part of her recovery. “I was constantly searching for any stories that offered me hope or salvation in this dark and testing time so that’s why I’ve shared this,” she says. Vivien Waterfield from the charity Home Start praised Laura for speaking up.“It’s very difficult for mums to talk about their difficulties they’re having,” she said. “Anyone in the public eye brave enough to talk about this publicly helps the mums to realise they are not alone.” A few years back, Kathryn Grant’s postpartum psychosis was an inspiration for an EastEnders storyline so Lacey Turner’s character Stacey had condition. She told Newsbeat that she had a horrendous birth and ended up not sleeping for ten nights.Kathryn gave birth to James five years ago. “I knew I needed to go to the A&E because I had a feeling something was about to go terribly wrong. “By the time James was taken from me and cared for by the staff there, I descended into full blown psychosis.” Kathryn says during her psychotic episode she was seeing things that weren’t there and believing things that weren’t true. “I believed was being tortured and punished because I caused an apocalypse and killed most people in the world and the remaining survivors were torturing and trying to cremate me alive,” she said. “The reality was I was in an ambulance being taken from psychiatric hospital to a regular hospital to be treated for sepsis. To get help and support with postpartum psychosis, take a look at the NHS page on the condition.
This woman photographed her postpartum psychosis recovery
The Bible says train a child in the way they should go so when they grow they will not depart from it. Especially boys are struggling because they do not express their real feelings for fear of being judged weak. This program is wonderful so must continue through teenage years into adulthood. Limited resources must not stop mentoring them at the most critical times in their lives. Like other Science projects of Professor Robert Wilson among others this program must continue for the next few more years so their hard work will not be in vain. This men are doing a great job and need sponsors to extend it further beyond childhood. It will be good to follow up throughout their teenage and adult years so they retain their knowledge and manners. Other peers and friends that come into their lives later without similar training can influence the vulnerable ones. So need help and support of well wishers to continue this program into teenage years, university, training for skills, careers to transition into adult life. Programmes like First University of the Child and Connections in the Secondary Schools enable children to get the right guidance required. In the past projects were limited to 4 years funding if run by government and then changed into another project for the sake of funding conditions. This is not sufficient long term to help them fully grasp life goals for good success. Their contemporaries often get private fundings to develop practical life skills to continue into business men or the chief executives of corporate bodies. While this program is highly valued and appreciated, please let it not be another statistics of 1% success years later because others drifted off. Coach Carter stood by his basketball playing students in their teenage years despite challenges faced. Please continue this hard work into the future so we look forward to more success from this story. Please ask for more help if you need it to support this program. If you can help please do not wait to be asked first because this good success impacts the community and nation as a whole. Well done and God bless you for your sacrifices and precious times devoted to helping these priceless children. Please encourage their reading skills and academic studies too like Coach Carter. EYE CONTACT IS CRUCIAL BECAUSE OTHER CULTURES TEACH CHILDREN OUT OF RESPECT NOT TO LOOK DIRECTLY INTO EYES OF ELDERS. Misunderstood by Western Countries as “lying” unable to keep eye contact, picked on needlessly, harrassed by law enforcement, lacking important knowledge to understand the difference in the upbringing of children by other cultures. This Instagram photo by @bayouredd
My life changed after university moving home, losing friends, broke unemployed after university. Kevin Broch left uni. with a short feeling of relief and a sense of achievement, followed by a long feeling of being lost. It’s the end of university and, if luck is on your side, you have had the best three years of your life. The nightlife was amazing; you’ve made lots of new, life-long friends, spending hours in the library on coursework and preparing for exams. Hopefully, this has paid off but what now? This is question many students ask themselves when they graduate but few realise adult life is about to come down on them like a tonne of bricks. When Kevin Broch graduated from Royal Holloway University of London, in 2015, was looking forward to leaving uni and beginning professional life. But, the feeling of hopefulness soon turned to helplessness.
Now a successful music producer, Kevin says teachers prepared him for leaving college and entering university – but when university comes to an end “no-one tells you what is next now it’s down to you. “I had short feeling of relief and a sense of achievement followed by long feeling of being lost,” he says. Many students say the final year of university tends to be the most stressful and that they can’t wait to hand in dissertations and be done with it.
But leaving can feel like an anticlimax, and that unique feeling of excitement, stimulation and freedom that university provided can be hard to replace. Claire Gamble, 33, says: “I felt heartbroken moving out of my house on last day of university I couldn’t stop crying.” After four great years of living independently and making solid friends while studying at University of Sheffield didn’t know what was happening next. Claire is not alone. Loneliness seems to be common feature of graduation blues. Kayleigh Rattle, 31, graduated from Warwick University in 2008, says: “Never forgets indescribable loneliness felt leaving university. “And, actually, I try not to think about the experience too much today because it still triggers a wistfulness so palpable for a time that’s now passed, and happened a decade ago.”
Many students aren’t ready to say their goodbye to close companions when they all go home. University prepares young people for transition from adolescence into adulthood but not the realities of working life? Graduate employment rate stands at 82% according to the Office of National Statistics in 2017, so it takes time to secure a fulltime job. So after three years of relative freedom, hordes of students will probably find themselves packing their bags and trundling back home to their parents’ house. Kayleigh says: “I really struggled with that – having a curfew again, not being able to sleep in the same bedroom as my boyfriend, and, I felt, being treated like a child again.”
This feeling of stepping backwards can be an extra incentive to find a “proper job”. Carolyn Mumby, counsellor coach with British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, says: “The return home can feel like trying to squash yourself back into the shape of your previous self. “It can be challenging to maintain your autonomy. “You may be challenging autonomy of your parents and carers who have adjusted to life without you living at home. There is a renegotiation of roles and relationships. Sophie Phillipson, 27, felt “ovewhelmed” and “nervous” at the prospect of facing adult life. She went on to found the website HelloGrads, which offers skills to help ease the transition from education to working life. She says: “You come out with a good degree and then reality hits. And it’s quite difficult because you think you’re going to get a good job, if you don’t, you can become overwhelmed.” Emily Williams, 24, and a Sheffield Hallam graduate, took a job that was really disappointing. She says she used to walk to work every day and think: “How can I get slightly injured, not enough to be seriously hurt or die, but just enough so I don’t have to go to work?” She suggests people take time to find out what they want to do. “There is absolutely no shame in going back home and getting a job at your local supermarket whilst you figure out what your passions are,” she says. “Don’t feel like you should already know what you want to do.”
Sophie says: “There’s a lot more to consider than you first think – and nobody tells you. “Money is constantly on your mind and there is a huge pressure to succeed from your parents, even though they have the best intentions.”
Student fees tripled in 2012 and Sophie believes this has a part to play in the pressure students place on themselves to succeed and make their degree “worth it.” Social media doesn’t help. “No-one posts the countless rejections they faced to get to their position,” Sophie says. But it isn’t all doom and gloom. Graduates are still likely to be employed than people with fewer qualifications. Claire says that although leaving university was tough, 12 years on she is settled, has a family of her own and a successful business. She believes young people shouldn’t expect working life to be like university. But should “embrace new challenges, because your next adventures are just beginning.” Emily seconds this and says: “No-one has a clue what they’re doing. People in their 30s tell me they don’t feel like proper adults yet. “Everyone is going with the flow and blagging it as they go.”
Pursuit of academic excellence within the ability of every child is important to reinforce need to help children get their priority right. As individual differences impact talents and abilities it means the child must be guided at own pace to be the best they can be. So children thrive right from onset of education or bloom later like bamboo shoots with delayed growth spurt. These difference in levels of achievements can frustrate children and parents who finds school difficult to cope with. The lack of support to help slow learners or gifted children causes them to implode, misbehave or disrupt the class. Compulsory education society has not succeeded in personally tailored education still. Therefore children find it extremely hard to adapt or adjust to the impossible standard imposed on the children. Worst of all is the unnecessary exams forced on children to grade them on league tables to prove which schools are the best in the country. However, a child in a privileged class private school is sitting exact exams with the deprived in society. This pressure compels some of those children unable to do so well to look for ways out of difficult impossible challenges they face daily in school. And some experience difficult circumstances at home, bereaved, or a divorced family, supporting sick or disabled parents or it is domestic or physical abuse, violence. With such backgrounds in some cases a child faces these extreme problems of a combination of all at the same time. On other occasions the language difficulties also compounds these problems. And its still expected of a child to be A* pupil or student in college and university later. These complex problems of the children can include poverty and starvation if in a deprived community but required to do well. Indeed some do well but most of the children facing these challenges cause them to react by rebelling with peers in similar situations for support. At times some parents are too busy and overwhelmed to realise what is going on a child’s lives before it is too late to help them. Meanwhile children’s look and appearance has become a welcome diversion for not doing so well. This is a major trend whereby their competitive urge to be the best dressed in the most expensive clothing brands and hair dos become the centre of focus. To belong to a peer group, their friends will not play or interact with them if the appearance is not deemed fit to be in their group. It is a serious issue causing fights and the attacks of those beaten for dressing less or more than peer group. Children are attacked for trainers, iphones, iPads or designer handbags or clothes. Most of the children dress better those working hard footing the bill for their designer wears. To fuel this hierarchy status turf wars, most resort to drug selling and a lifestyle beyond their means. Pressure to conform means whatever means can be used to accomplish demands is used. Not focussing on home work to keep up with their academic education means unachievable grades and poor results. The cycle is repeated after not achieving good grades becomes more frustrated with career options. Due to their tastes and expensive lifestyle some find it hard to work a daily job or keep up with stable employment. Some are now used earning thousands of dollars in the streets so continue that way. But it gets complicated as they face threats of attacks of turf wars and gang fights. It is interesting the millennial generation with every abundant material wealth in modern times beyond past generations are also the most unhappy, stressed and miserable ones. On top of all these is an addiction to games, drugs, alcohol and a risk taking dare-devil lifestyle cutting short-lived in their prime. The children have becomes victims of superabundant society more interested in profits or the value of property than emotional needs of these children. Year on year statistics show things are getting worse for these generation trapped in cycle of external appearance and look more than content of their character. Superficial egotistic fleeting looks and clothing labels seems more important to them than priceless God-given natural life. Superabundance around lure them to think only external material things and looks count most. In the process create anger, envy, jealousy, hatred and fights some willing to kill peers for. And yet the root of this problem is not addressed to guide these children to find fulfillment in real value of life preservation. Pressure to get rich quick to get the most expensive gadgets, games and physical looks overrule desire to study hard. Most find academic work too frustrating but remain in school as the las demands. So disturb the class or attack dedicated children working hard and excelling. The solution is not simple but pressure to attain league tables is a part of the cause of frustrations of some those children. In addition, the families have very high expectations of them so also pressurize them to work harder. If a child becomes overwhelmed, look for support from friends and peers to help them rather confide in parents. So the cycle of frustration, is numbed by TV watching, games or playing out with the friends. They cannot stay at home alone so go out on the streets among the drug dealers and grooming paedophiles who take advantage of their naivety. Is there any way educational purpose becomes imparting knowledge to children to gain information relevant to their lives and not merely business for exam boards to grade them on the exam league tables. There is direct connection between the compulsory pressure knowledge power uses to control people. Millions are even more frustrated after university when they realise not many human jobs are available to do. With higher standard of living and surmounting debts now face even more challenging circumstances after graduation. These global millineal generation cannot farm, eat from home-grown produce or survive with money spent several a day. It is a generation revolving around money and material things while tons of food and clothing are thrown away daily by privileged. It sends wrong message about capitalism as acquisition of global resources for a few. Children watch and yearn for such luxury goods at their doorsteps so often above their means. They crave their cut in these illusive wealth they see but do not attain despite academic success. It is gets worse as the system set up frustrate them to turn on each other by hanging around others than value their families. Parents under pressure doing several jobs need to set time aside each night to be with their children and talk to them. The support of families in the lives of the children makes a great deal of difference. Sacrifice a personal selfish comfort at expense of children to nurture them and spend quality time with them. Get to know your children to be the first person they talk to rather than a wrong friend putting them under peer pressure to get into trouble. At the end of the day him life is the best gift in life God gives so treasure children and teach them go value their lives. Yes it is good to look good and dress well but it must not becomes a cause of conflict in school education. A decent moderate appearance with excellent grades often helps gain exceptional opportunities to accomplish great things. Just take a look at photo of old clothes and hairstyles to ask yourself is this the reason one could not study hard to build a career? Unless in the fashion industry business clothes change with colours of seasons so worth asking yourself if its better to invest in books, educational gadget, school needs to enhance academic achievement. And parents must not condone with children to argue with schools over hairdo and designer clothing than grades in school. A lot of children waste time on dressing up, make ups, changing their looks for Selfies and preoccupied with vanity. So do not study and hope for quick bucks making money by unrealistic methods. It is necessary to help children study at home, supervised and checked without fibs of assignments done on the school computer. This generation is so smart parents need to be aware to help them. Some play away their youth and pay for it by having to suffer in middle age. And the gifted embark on success sacrificing youth to pave way to rewarding future but feel lonely and isolated. Recently, David Graeber, LSE anthropologist and author, said 37-40% of people feel their jobs are pointless; worse still, they are generally correct. The career they chose did not fulfil them as school subjects were forced on them to meet criteria for grants. The chance of feeling valued in society after emerging from strains of final education is challenging for those who struggled in school or the gifted who made it with excellent grades. Can education meet realistic needs of pupils and students? Others adopt the extreme measures of taking their lives when it was too much to deal with challenges of life. What is the purpose of education if it creates casualties than fulfilled adults.
Psalm 119:99-100 says that students can have more knowledge, insight and more understanding than all their teachers as testimony of God’s gift, talent or favour. Honouring God, by meditating on word of God, following precept by precept to listen accurately and obey instruction means knowledge expands. I understand more than the ancients, because I keep God’s precepts. God gave Daniel knowledge, intelligence in all letters and in science. Daniel had understanding in all science and interpretation of visions, complex dreams. Daniel 1:4-17 praised the young men without blemish, handsome, gifted in all wisdom. Children in whom there was no blemish, well-favoured, skilful in all wisdom and knowledge with an understanding of science. These four young men God gave them knowledge and skill in all kinds of science of their time. God gave to Daniel special ability in understanding meanings of dreams like Joseph. Daniel and his friends had more knowledge in science and wisdom because of God’s Hands upon their lives. They impressed Babylon king in Iraq so much with knowledge God gave them so they were made courtiers in the king’s palace. They advised the king and also Daniel was promoted to be a supervisor. Daniel’s ability to reveal and interpret a king’s dream brought favour of God’s promotion. The king decreed Daniel’s God is Only ONE TRUE LIVING GOD to be worshipped. Due to miracles seen of Daniel not being eaten in the lion’s den or burnt by fire Son of God Jesus joined them in. It is important to be humble in using whatever gifts of knowledge God gives us for His Glory in Jesus Name. I experienced visions in my dream where God showed me complex statistics and data about various constellations, space calculations I not know existed before my dream. God beamed these data onto the sky so I told God to wait for me to go get paper to write them down because it was too much for me to memorize all in my dream but I woke up. To my greatest surprise all God revealed in my dream was already online available on Google. I could not believe my eyes and I shared testimony many times. God is source of all knowledge so its good to give God all the Glory and thanks for talents helping accomplish good success in Jesus Name. The Holy Spirit brings to remembrance knowledge to recall what we learn or see in visions to testify the goodness of God. If struggling in any field of study seek God’s face for Mercy and Grace to receive knowledge, wisdom to achieve excellence. Akiane is a living example of God teaching her to paint by meditating in the presence of God to receive visions to draw. She is known all over the world as, “Girl Taught Art by God.” God’s gifts, talents, and skills are to enhance quality of life to bless mankind. Remember to thanks to God for protect the knowledge given you. Just as Father God is happy to see HIS Children success the devil wants to sabotage knowledge and the glory of mankind. The devil goes extra miles to pervert, destroy, ruin, counterfeit the real knowledge of God. Some destroyed by family strongholds that subdue the gifts and talents of God due to envy and jealousy. So it is good to be under God’s POWER to protect knowledge given you to flourish and thrive as God wants for you in Jesus Name. Cover yourself with BLOOD of Jesus and talk to your pastor as the young man in this video did to receive breakthrough in Jesus Name.