VALUE & CARE FOR ELDERS

God says value elders and care for them so you will live long and be blessed by God it will be well with you. This is the commandment God made and condition attached for those obeying word of God. There are three types of care provided for elders depending on their needs. 1. Medical Care for their health by doctors, pharmacists, nurses and auxiliary staff. 2. Personal Assistants: family, friends or employed to feed, wash, clean premises, personal hygiene, laundry, shop, outing and talking to them as human beings daily if able to communicate. If unable to talk suitable contact for awareness so not alone. 3. Financial Provisions by family if they can afford it or support from public funds. Examine your life and see which category of care needs is possibly provided by you. There are so many unsung heroes 24/7 doing all care needs alone without support or respite care or break to rest and recover from stress. God says HE judges the nations by care provided for “the least of these” in society which includes elders. Those unable to repay the cost of kindness and generosity towards them is important to Jesus who at times disguises Himself to test love for others. There is assumption as long as money is sent regularly to the elders, latest most expensive gadget and grandest designer homes provided, paid for agency staff taking care of them they will be fine. Genuine caring agencies have limited time per person from 15 minutes to hour because of shortage of staff. Quality care impossible to provide within such a limited time frame. They must spread their time between many patients and rush through care because it’s so expensive to pay for the services. Most elders are forced to sell the family homes to pay for medical care so have no inheritance left to pass on to loved ones. These elders sacrificed and fought wars to defend and protect the nation’s and resources taken for granted by the modern generations. Sadly, when elders are too old to work, earn or mobile they are considered useless by very society indulging in their labour, sweat or toils. cheerful african family at home using tablet pcRemember one day you too will grow old and must not forget the elders. Many have incomes that can provide for elders but choose to ignore them. Others lost contact so do not have awareness of their wellbeing whether they are even alive. Many live close by for many years unknown to each other until after death they discover how near each other they were. A misconception of Bible to “leave father and mother and cleave to wife” misinterpreted by some to mean ABANDON FAMILY. So they cut the family off, isolate themselves from a family that sacrifice everything to raise them into who they are. They prefer the company of their vibrant friends as the society promotes friendships above the family. Many do not realise they can set up funds to provide an elders needs and delegate assistant for the personal care PAY for their time and services and not taken for granted because relatives in the family. Gadget care is good idea but is limited in PRACTICAL FUNCTIONS so mechanised human care. People in their last stages of life need comforting touch of healing even from a hired wellbeing or death doula is better than complete isolation. Often an elder in “second childhood” of life is literally a helpless toddler unable to think, decide or care for themselves. This shocks the family who watch a strong parent turn into a helpless child. To many people they seem as acting to demand attention so may not be helped immediately. It is after years of trying in vain before the help required is ascertained for them. It is necessary to understand some cannot keep up with paper work, documents, online technology constantly changing, become forgetful and in extreme cases suffer from dementia. Dementia means they have no control over thoughts so can offend others, use perverted speech totally unlike them in the previous years. May eat but forget and say they have not eaten or not eat and say they have eaten. Those immobile are carried like baby, washed, fed or use commode wheelchair, zema frame. ideas_reuniones_familiares.destacadaActive elders can be slow in walking or going up and descending stairs as Mr Bean’s video experience shows. Some drive slower or misunderstand road signs so find themselves in the wrong lane. Its not attention seeking deliberate winding of modern generations. It is the lack of awareness due to peering society so seen as them versus us. It is worse if they cannot express themselves or they became dependent on the very people they raised. Some unfortunately resent them or are embarrassed due to their nature, illness or condition. Elders now live longer due to better health care but after pension some outlive their income and need top up from the family or the society as a whole. The amount of waste thrown away can be used to provide the care needed. So many unemployed can volunteer to help clean premises, shop and cook for those who want help. Pool of human resources available is ignored for the sophisticated expensive gadgets gulping limited resources. So society is responsible for all elders not privileged few whose needs are not compromised. It’s beyond belief how quickly resources are made available for some while the others are delayed or ignored because not regarded as human enough. Above all nobody brought anything into this world or will anyone take anything out. So GOD is the source of all human life and the material resources HE provides for the well-being of all. A competitive spirit wants to be seen as having the best and most expensive material things mislead some to not provide for elders. Take a look at past gadgets, you often ask yourself “what was I thinking?” You laugh at old useless past fads, fashions, bags, shoes, clothes, hairstyles, decors, gadgets, or phones, homes etc. prices paid for by starving elders abandoned. Some use coban excuse to give to God, church, other societies, organisations, charities, animal welfare but not give to human relatives. The irony is those abandoned elders celebrated after death by family members dressed like going to wedding. Changing funeral clothes to show off or partying into late hours, nights for days, weeks and some for months. The house painted, decorated to impress guests, plenty food or drinks provided to feed thousands. But if elder requested help for food or a medicine ignored as needy or greedy or too demanding. Fear of not burying in grand style overrules need to provide adequate care to celebrate life while alive. Needs of the elders must be compulsory academic subject taught in schools to put some sense into modern generations to teach them respect and value of senior citizens who built the nation’s they enjoy so take for granted. Volunteer must support professional medical teams and value each other. Befrienders can visit and talk to elders to keep them in their own homes than lump them together just for high profit margins at the expense of priceless lives now devalued and treated as worthless by those who do not understand God’s command with condition attached for the good of the blesser and the blessed. The government must stop punishing carers and mothers who provide 24/7 care often treated as unemployed. They provide care, manage home and work in addition but mistreated. Human life is priceless and children, women, elders pay the price for reckless policies that abandon those not considered worthy for equal treatment by privileged. Those working have limited time allowed off work to care for elders, forced, abandon them to work to pay for their rent, basic food without the essential human touch. Everyone has relative somewhere who is elderly and needs their attention and care. Others may not be aware a family extends beyond 2:4 structured family. It is not EASY to care but God’s command instructs all to value and care for elders who bear or sacrificed their life to help you. God did not say only care if they are perfect, so do it through negotiated family team appointed, well noted by all on board of care plan. Past cultures use to frown on stranger seeing ‘nakedness’ of elders but better than abandonment. If you do not provide care while elders are alive, spare yourself debt to impress your friends for grand funeral. God will not ask you how grand was their send off funeral party you organised. God will ask for souls you provided for alive, entrusted to you, believe it or not. God says your life and wellbeing depends on their care. Ethical medicine must treat them as humans not commodities for sale to lowest bid cheap services. Some carers punished “as not working” this must be reconciled to treat them well as foster carers paid for doing same jobs. Just because they are relatives or family members does not mean they do not provide excellent care. In fact the elders prefer loved ones in their last moment but work prevents them. So those who choose to fulfil God’s command to care for and value their loved ones must not be treated less than other professional carers. Elders and poor people must be valued and treated better everywhere in the whole world including deprived underprivileged in Western countries to obey God in Jesus Name.

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ANOREXIA DAMAGES BODY

Lizzie Porter lived with anorexia throughout her teens. Now in late 20s, she’s been discovering that those years of starvation have left a lasting imprint on her body. “You have osteoporosis in your spine and osteopenia in your hip. I’m going to put you on calcium and vitamin D and I think you should take them forever. We need to prevent breaks and fractures.” It is May 2018, and my doctor’s words jolt me out of a long-standing state of denial. They come with a set of complicated graphs, which apparently show my low bone density. I don’t understand them. But I can read the words printed next to a fuzzy X-ray-like picture of my spine: “World Health Organization classification: osteoporosis. Fracture risk: high.” For years, I have muddled along, pretending to myself that I had pretty much made a full recovery from anorexia. Yes, I was told back in 2010 that I had osteoporosis. But over the next eight years I persuaded myself that things must have improved, that the holes in my spine must have healed.

Sadly, they haven’t.


Osteoporosis and osteopenia

  • Osteoporosis is a condition in which bones lose their strength and are more likely to break
  • If your bone density is between the lower end of the normal range and the osteoporosis range, you have osteopenia.

Source: National Osteoporosis Society


I was first diagnosed with anorexia at the age of 12, and soon experienced its unglamorous consequences. As summers grew hotter, I shivered: I was like a reptile, unable to generate my own body heat. In winter, my skin cracked and bled, but would not heal, for want of nutrition. I had constipation, bloating and my hair fell out in great clumps. My life revolved around avoiding food.  Over the past 15 years, I have had two in-patient stints in hospital and taken thousands of antidepressants – anorexia is often accompanied by a low mood, sometimes even a suicidal mood is one reason it has the highest mortality rate of all psychiatric disorders. I have seen more doctors than I can be bothered to remember. I have done my best to keep what my mother calls the “anorexic minx” in my mind in check, preventing it from doing a Jack-in-the-Box-style bounce back into my life. The desire to get on with things has spurred me to give up many of my anorexic behaviour patterns. Time was, I would spend hours weighing out salad components in the kitchen, using a different knife to chop each tomato, cucumber and lettuce leaf. I no longer want to waste time on my old routines. And, mostly, I do not.

Lizzie Porter and Muhammad EidoLizzie Porter with a friend – her teeth may look healthy but have required expensive treatment

Anorexia caused my body to age rapidly and I am struggling with the disorder’s longer-term consequences. Osteoporosis involves loss of bone density, and in later life may lead to painful breakages, curvature of the spine, and loss of height. Although it has many causes and often affects post-menopausal women, anorexics are also at risk, especially girls who develop the illness at puberty when the body is trying to build a strong skeleton. For a day or so, the bone scans shake me awake. I walk around the Lebanese capital Beirut, where I live, feeling a bit sick. What am I doing to myself? The thought rolls over in my mind. I remember one elderly woman in my home village in Hertfordshire, who used to walk bent double. Osteoporosis is an old ladies’ problem, I tell myself angrily. I am only 27. Yet all too soon I return to my state of calm apathy. I pretend that my bones aren’t really thin and weak. I’m strong and perfectly healthy, I tell myself, even though I am on calcium and Vitamin D supplements for life, I get dizzy when I stand up, and blood tests show I have been suffering badly from anaemia – a lack of red blood cells or haemoglobin in the blood. To improve my bone density I should eat more and gain a little weight. But my life is “too busy” to deal with the stress of challenging the last remnants of my anorexic behaviour. I still add up my daily calorie count on a calculator, and I am prone to lash out at anyone who forces to me to eat things I am scared of, such as cake, pastry and cream. This year I have at least allowed a friend to coax me into ordering salad with oil – this fills me with pride, though at the same time I feel ashamed of years I spent worrying over salad dressing. But I need to go further. Osteoporosis is not the only long-term effect of my anorexia. The loss of bone density has also affected my teeth, which ache and easily rot. Since the beginning of the year I have spent £4,200 ($5,500) on dental treatment, including eight fillings, root canal treatment, two crowns and an implant.

X-ray of Lizzie Porter's teeth
 X-ray of Lizzie Porter’s teeth

“The lack of calcium and vitamin D is definitely contributing to this,” says my doctor – a GP who happens to be a specialist in eating disorders. One upshot of my weak teeth and gums is that after years of being subject to psychological barriers that restricted my diet, I now have physical ones. Anything chewy, crunchy or cold is almost impossible to eat. Can you recover from anorexia?

  • A 2002 study found that 46% of patients made a full recovery, a third improved (but retained some eating disorder symptoms), and 20% remained chronically ill over the long term
  • The eating disorder charity, Beat, says recovery is always possible with the right help and support – but what recovery looks like is individual to the person
  • It adds that most medical complications arising from anorexia are reversible, but not all – for example, osteoporosis

It is difficult to predict how badly anorexia will affect each sufferer’s long-term health: bodies react in different ways. Other possible long-term effects can include infertility and difficulty conceiving, heart problems, and kidney and liver complications, according to the UK-based eating disorders charity, Beat. “I don’t think people realise the dangers of the illness and its physical and mental consequences, including the suicide risk. I know it frightens people, but we need to know the facts,” says Jane Smith, chief executive of the UK-registered charity Anorexia and Bulimia Care. The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence guidelines for treating anorexia instruct doctors to explain to sufferers that the main way of preventing and treating low bone density is “reaching and maintaining a healthy body weight or BMI for their age.”If I am entirely honest with myself, I know I have to try a little bit harder if I am to minimise the long-term consequences of anorexia. I certainly cannot go backwards. I have enough purpose in my life to want to live it. I have a job as a journalist that I love, friends I trust, and parents who support my every move. One morning this May, one of my closest friends, Leila, sent me a WhatsApp message in response to one of my many rants. I was tired and fed-up with life. “I’m not going to tell you a few kilos won’t make you fat, because that’s what’s in your head,” she wrote. “I’m going to tell you that you get to choose between being ‘fat’ and functioning, or thin and bed-bound. You get to be thin but your life is over. That’s all there is to it.”

What can I say? Most of me knows she is right.

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PLASTIC FREE PARTY CHOICE

Lindsay and Glen

Lindsay, 36, a writer from Kent, and her Australian husband Glen, 38, first tried living without plastic in 2012. It started out as a month-long challenge so turned into a way of life for the pair who live in Perth, Western Australia. “I’m more the driver than him but we got involved at the same time,” she says. “I’m the one that puts in more work but he agrees with all the values.” So going plastic free for their wedding, in 2014, was a no-brainer.Table decorationsPlastic finds way into weddings in many forms of food storage, drink packaging, decorations, flower delivery – that’s just the start. For Lindsay, who blogs about living without waste, trying to make her special day plastic free came first ahead of any other wishes. “We said we want to be plastic free ‘how can we do that,’ rather than saying, ‘We want roses, we want to have canapes, can we do plastic free memorable but not break the bank. Simplicity was key. To me simple means no fuss and devoting whole weekends to projects was out, says Lindsay.Food menuInvolving suppliers from outset was the most effective way of making a plastic-free event happen, she says. “It’s really about having conversations with people and explaining why you want to do it. People are willing.” But its about taking matters into you own hands. “If you get stuff delivered to you, that’s when it comes in packaging. It was making sure on the day we went to all the deli, the bakery et cetera so we could guarantee there was no packaging.” Eco Wedding Styles done includes recycled materials.Wedding decorations

  • Invitations: electronic, sent via email or Facebook
  • Flowers: freshly picked by family and friends from their gardens, arranged in old jam-jars
  • Decorations: borrowed lace bunting from old tablecloths and curtains • tins fished out of recycling bins and wrapped in twine and in hessian ribbon, which was also used for table runners • hired tablecloths and tea cups • bought beeswax candles in jars
  • Food: local businesses focused on locally sourced produce • hired pizza oven • cakes from a bakery that didn’t use plastic packaging • Indian snacks donated by a friend as a wedding gift
  • Drink: tap beer and cider • local wine • pre-made soft drinks served in jugs • loose tea and coffee • no straws
  • Tableware: venue’s own crockery and cutlery (although having pizza minimised amount needed) • borrowed glasses
  • Gifts: guests told not to buy presents – to avoid any waste and wrapping
  • Dress: rather than spend hours trawling charity shops, the bride bought a High-Street dress she wore again and then sold on eBay
  • Hair and make-up: used make-up bride had • washed hair with bicarbonate of soda and vinegar
  • Favours/confetti: did without it

Lindsay and Glen's weddingLindsay and Glen married local bowling club in Perth Lindsay accepts achieving a 100% plastic-free wedding also meant relying on other people. For wedding, they hired a pizza oven and used a local deli to provide fresh ingredients without plastic packaging but did they know what went on behind the scenes? “It’s possible some plastic that I didn’t see… whether he got a packet of salad in a plastic bag, I don’t know were counterbalanced by air miles required to fly her family albeit just four people to Australia. “In hindsight, I should have fallen in love with the guy in the village – but I didn’t,” Lindsay jokes. “I fell in love with a guy in Australia, so it’s one of those things you have to compromise. My parents, my sister and brother flying out for a wedding – it’s a one-off.” They did decide to have the wedding as local as possible in the city of Perth, rather than the countryside, to reduce driving distances. How difficult for Eugenie to achieve? Wedding planner Katrina Otter says working with the right people is key, as some of the more “old-school suppliers” are less keen to adapt. “Make sure you have the right team on board, work with a team willing to do it or one where it’s already part of their ethos.” She adds: Bride and groom might not know plastic involved cutlery wrapped in cling film. No royal wedding is complete without a vibrant floral display.The Duke and Duchess of Sussex leaving the chapelFlowers were a big part of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s wedding day And, traditionally, a key part of those has been the floral foam – the bricks of green, spongy foam that provide a foundation for floral arrangements, as well as a water source. Katrina says finding an alternative to the non-biodegradable plastic material has become a big issue for the industry and many florists are looking to do it another way. The florist who created the displays for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s wedding, Philippa Craddock, says she didn’t use any floral foam for their big day. The number of couples requesting plastic-free weddings is on the rise, says Katrina, although it remains a small proportion. Another issue to consider for any bride having live TV coverage is the hair and make-up. Kate Arnell, who blogged about her zero-waste wedding, in 2014, says she found it tricky to find plastic-free make-up and hair products. There are a lot more available and since swapped to plastic-free alternatives she says. Whether Princess Eugenie opts for Lindsay’s bicarbonate of soda, vinegar concoction on hair yet to be confirmed. Eugenie wedding wants plastic free on big day. In addition to venue, food and drink, music, the dress, hair and make-up, a bride’s checklist goes on. And also Princess Eugenie added another factor into equation her wedding to be plastic free. The Queen’s granddaughter, who is marrying Jack Brooksbank on 12 October, told British Vogue the couple’s house was anti-plastic and want our wedding to be like that as well.” So how realistic is it? Lindsay Miles discovered, there are quite a few things to take into consideration. If it is just one day, why bother? “A wedding is such a significant day that it’s even more important to be true to your values than on any other day,” says Lindsay. “You can’t go back on your values just because you’re getting married.”

  • Are you ready for another royal wedding?
  • WATCH: Five ways to break up with plastic

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3 SINGLE PARENTS UNITED

Watch the BBC’s Victoria Derbyshire programme on weekdays between 09:00 and 11:00 BST on BBC Two and the BBC News Channel in the UK and on iPlayer afterwards.

Family & Education

  • 4 October 2018

A BOOZE FREE UNIVERSITY?

Group of friends with one man drinking from a pint glassIs booze free university really possible with lots of money for students to spend as they please? Seven ways to be booze-free at uni to still have fun honestly for the Sober students to rejoice as follows. For   years, the word ‘uni’ and ‘freshers’ is synonymous with getting absolutely hammered and, too often, pretending to have fun. But times are a-changing – in fact according to recent research, young people nowadays are less likely to drink alcohol than people their age were 10 years ago. Gen Z-ers in have clean-living smoothie-drinking reputation that looks great on the ‘gram – but doesn’t mix well with getting so drunk you fall asleep in your own sick. Remember that bit in the teen romance To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, where Peter Kavinsky (swoon) goes to get Lara Jean a drink at a house party and comes back with kombucha? Yeah, that’s not one-off film thing. Now, universities are finally catching up – and it’s becoming easier than ever before to get off the sauce (or remain off, if you never took up drinking in the first place). For instance, there are loads of student societies that are centred around stuff that doesn’t involve alcohol, or are even specifically geared towards non-drinkers. If you’d rather live in teetotal accommodation, that’s a thing nowThis is far from exhaustive list, but here are a few ways you can navigate uni as a non-drinker and still have a hella good time.

Go to booze-free festival

You don’t have to be drunk (and/or tripping) to enjoy a good festival these days, with alcohol-free events across the UK. These fests have everything you might expect – street food, talks, live music – but with alcohol-free drinks, like 0% beer and wine. Maybe grab a bunch of your new uni friends and take a road trip to one near you – and you don’t need to single out a designated driver for the journey back.

Choose non-alcoholic drinks at club nights and pubs We know, we know – this is easier said than done. Despite everything we might say about cultural shifts, pubs and clubs are very much seen as places to drink. So for whatever reason, you might not want the people you’re out with to know that you’re not drinking. Maybe they’re a bit obnoxious about it, maybe you’ve only just met them and are worried it might be an awkward subject to broach, maybe you can’t be bothered to explain. In these cases, you just need to sneakily order non-alcoholic replicas of these classic alcoholic drinks. For example, it’s a little-known fact that a gin and tonic actually looks exactly the same as a glass of just tonic water. Same thing goes for vodka, lime and soda, vodka and cranberry, rum and Coke… and so on. But be warned this deception is a little bit harder to pull off with tequila shots and Jagerbombs. It may be easier to ‘fess up than to explain to the bar staff that you’d like a shot glass of water and you may be surprised to find for a lot of people not drinking is really NBD.

Replace pub crawls with food crawls

Seriously we don’t want to encourage unhealthy eating habits, there is greater joy than eating so much you feel like you’re about to give birth to a seven-course meal. Only occasionally, of course. Why not turn it into a bit of a thing, and get a few friends together to restaurant-hop across town? Plus, we’re sure we don’t need to tell you that all those tasty treats are perfect Instagram fodder. If you’re not into stuffing your face with gourmet burgers, why not go on a coffee crawl? Get your mates together and go from cafe to cafe, trying all the different drinks on the menu, or different types of coffee bean?Look at all this coffeeLook at all this coffee although, a small warning, writer did this with a friend, who ended up physically shaking from obscene levels of caffeine in the system. So you should probably alternate with caffeine-free herbal teas so you don’t accidentally overdose. Oh, and speaking of caffeine… Find alternatives Unless you’re straight edge and that’s totally cool you might consider choosing other vice. Caffeine, mentioned above. Or cheese, shown to have an addictive quality. Or if a vegan, cashew cheese yes, really. Or other kinds of vices you could choose we don’t need to go into.

Join lots of societies at your uni

Teetotal societies in particular. They could definitely be more common, but it’s a positive sign that some unis now have non-drinking societies. One group, Are You Not Drinking Much? (AYNDM) society at University of Kent, says it welcomes anyone on the alcohol spectrum whether they’re teetotal, or regular drinkers who fancy booze-free evening. Teetotal societies good way to meet other non-drinkers for non-boozy activities together like film screenings, quizzes game nights or AYNDM Where’s Wally? treasure hunt evenings Which brings us to our next point…Drinking exercise

Join your student union gym

Yeah, OK, we know most freshers don’t look like this IRL… Why get plastered, when you can get shredded? SU gyms tend to be much cheaper than their non-uni alternatives, and if you’re lucky, they may do HIIT and other exercise classes. If you’re looking for something bit fancier, most mainstream gyms discounted student membership with access to exercise classes. That way, you can bond with people over a protein shake afterwards. And finally…

Hook up with people who remember

When sober, you know you won’t wake up in the morning with all-too-common feeling of shame, regret, and intense self-loathing. Nope you know if you’ve woken up with another person next to you, then they’re someone you would want to bone in the cold light of day. Success! Plus, it’ll generally be easier to tell if you’re boring someone senseless when you’re trying to talk to them. Yes, we’ve seen meme…There you have it fun time is possible without sauce if you know where to look, you can get all the good bits of uni life minus ‘being sick in a public toilet at 3am’ moment. Lasting impact on relationship or mental health caused by drunken assault is a serious matter. Remember not to take lightly a few moment’s passion damage for life. Its freewill choice to dress or drink as you like but sends the wrong message of “implied consent.” Body language or eye contact flirting, signals interest and the willingness to be involved with them. As actions speak louder than words before interaction with anyone ask yourself, be honest, what is your motive to be in the company of that person privately. Prior to going out into a discreet space out of sight of safety of group in premises ask yourself why you trust that person and want to be exclusively with them as a special friend. Is “coffee” in public cafe, bar, restaurant, drinks not good enough so want extra special time night alone with that person? Amos 3:3 says do two want to be together unless they have an agreement. Spending long hours in their company “implies” you enjoy being with them. Bible say avoid appearance of evil as Psalm 1:1 warns be NOT in company of, stand together with, listen to advise of others without you questioning how you feel about it? Is is loneliness, power struggle to please for job, promotion or status? Once in their company wrongly presumed you “subtly agreed” to their intentions. It’s difficult to know if they intend to spike your drink as they seem kind, friendly and charming. Don’t be fooled, charmed by special attention to groom, develop Stockholm syndrome attachment by their kindness. EXCUSE yourself to “lavatory” with your purse, bag and discreetly leave premises NOT IN THEIR CAR!!! If it means being fired your life mind and dignity intact. Your friendly polite compliant persona often mistaken its ‘OK to force’ you. So ‘rape’ or sexual assault is strange to them as prior actions signal wrongly ‘it’s okay’ to proceed further. It DOES matter what to wear, drink, drugs or pull because sexy clothes designed to taunt and stir horny feeling to indulge. Intent REINFORCED by such cumulative actions misleading ‘perpetrator.’ Its worse if alcohol, drugs blurs mind for consent confusing signal mixed message of ‘consent by default.’ It takes two to tango write these questions down and check yourself before going out what is your purpose and intentions for following friendly person to private space alone? If unsure take friends with you; Brandy protected her friend dating on show, took control, dragged a friend home to save her from attack. Don’t rely on exclusive responsibility perpetrator to mislead to ‘proceed.’ Get their written consent to avoid blackmail to save your reputation, do not comply under durex, SCREAM, SHOUT. Before going out, ask why follow a person to discreet private space? Get friends to drink PUBLICLY in cafe, restaurants, pubs etc. Meeting the person regularly influence you but does not mean YOU KNOW WHO THEY ARE so avoid BEING CATFISHED. Pray and cover yourself with BLOOD of Jesus, call on Jesus who loves you to protect and save you in Jesus Name.

 

BEING FAT BUT FIT IS MYTH?

Andrea webBeing “fat but fit” is a myth doctors have warned. People overweight at increased risk of having a heart attack no matter how healthy they are. A major study of more than half a million people across Europe found those overweight, obese or fat had up to a 28 per cent higher risk of developing coronary heart disease as arteries in the heart clog causing a heart attack or heart failure. The overweight people were at higher risk even if they had healthy blood pressure, blood sugar and cholesterol levels. So latest findings contradict the previous smaller studies suggesting some overweight people can be healthy if they do not suffer from the negative effect connected to weight gain high blood pressure. Researchers led by Imperial College London, Cambridge University, said the study show concept of being fat but fit was ‘a myth.” Lead author, Dr Camille Lassale, said: “Our findings challenge a concept of ‘healthy obese.’ “The research shows overweight individuals who appear healthy are at increased risk of heart disease. Findings suggest patients overweight or obese need all efforts to be made to help them get back to a healthy weight. Even if their blood pressure, blood sugar and cholesterol appear within normal range excess weight is still risk factor. For the study the largest of its kind to date, the scientists looked at health data from the European Prospective Investigation into Cancer and Nutrition (EPIC) on 520,000 people from 10 countries including UK.How-to-Decide-on-Gastric-Bypass-Surgery-to-Lose-Weight-400x389

In follow-up period of around 12 years a total of 7,637 people study experienced a serious event linked to a heart disease, like heart attack or death. Researchers compared this group with 10,000 others in study to analyse link between having heart disease event, weight and general health. They found that healthy people overweight had a 26 per cent increased risk developing heart disease compared to the healthy people of normal weight. The risk for healthy obese people with a BMI over 30 was 28 per cent. Scientists said this may be due to the overweight eventually leads to health problems so people with excess weight who were healthy at the start of the study may have gone on to develop problems which led to heart disease. Dr Ioanna Tzoulaki from the Imperial’s School of Public Health, said: ‘I think there is no longer this concept of healthy obese. Our study shows people with excess weight might be classed as ‘healthy’ but have not yet developed an unhealthy metabolic profile. That comes later in the timeline, then they have an event like a heart attack.” Researchers found being unhealthy was a key risk for developing heart disease, no matter what their BMI was. Participants in the study were classed as “unhealthy” if they had three key markers: high blood sugar, blood pressure, cholesterol or a large waist size of more than 37′ (94cm) for men or 31′ (80cm) for women. Brian“Unhealthy” people were at more than a double risk of developing heart disease regardless of whether of normal weight, overweight or obese. Unhealthy obese people at the highest risk two and half times healthy people of a normal weight. Scientists took into account the lifestyle factors such as smoking, diet, exercise and socioeconomic status. They are looking into exactly how the obesity leads to heart attacks study published in European Heart Journal. The Professor Metin Avkiran, the associate medical director at British Heart Foundation, which part-funded the research, said: “This study provides robust evidence that there is no such thing as ‘healthy obesity.’ “It shows that being obese increases a person’s risk of developing heart disease, even if they are otherwise healthy. “The take-home message is maintaining a healthy body weight is key step towards maintaining a healthy heart.” Earlier this year Dutch study of 5,300 people suggested obese over-55s could stay healthy if they kept active for at least four hours a day. They found exercise reduced risk of suffering a heart attack or stroke, regardless of someone’s BMI implying it was possible to be both fat and fit. That is the current position educating big people to go for regular check ups even if they feel well. It is better to ensure being fat or big as a healthy way of life lasts into the future to avoid any preventable heart attacks. 

MY LIFE AFTER UNIVERSITY

Kevin BrochMy life changed after university moving home, losing friends, broke unemployed after university. Kevin Broch left uni. with a short feeling of relief and a sense of achievement, followed by a long feeling of being lost. It’s the end of university and, if luck is on your side, you have had the best three years of your life. The nightlife was amazing; you’ve made lots of new, life-long friends, spending hours in the library on coursework and preparing for exams. Hopefully, this has paid off but what now? This is question many students ask themselves when they graduate but few realise adult life is about to come down on them like a tonne of bricks. When Kevin Broch graduated from Royal Holloway University of London, in 2015, was looking forward to leaving uni and beginning professional life. But, the feeling of hopefulness soon turned to helplessness.

‘Heartbroken’

Now a successful music producer, Kevin says teachers prepared him for leaving college and entering university – but when university comes to an end “no-one tells you what is next now it’s down to you. “I had short feeling of relief and a sense of achievement followed by long feeling of being lost,” he says. Many students say the final year of university tends to be the most stressful and that they can’t wait to hand in dissertations and be done with it.

Claire GambleClaire Gamble found it really hard to meet people or settle into new life after university

But leaving can feel like an anticlimax, and that unique feeling of excitement, stimulation and freedom that university provided can be hard to replace. Claire Gamble, 33, says: “I felt heartbroken moving out of my house on last day of university I couldn’t stop crying.” After four great years of living independently and making solid friends while studying at University of Sheffield didn’t know what was happening next. Claire is not alone. Loneliness seems to be common feature of graduation blues. Kayleigh Rattle, 31, graduated from Warwick University in 2008, says: “Never forgets indescribable loneliness felt leaving university. “And, actually, I try not to think about the experience too much today because it still triggers a wistfulness so palpable for a time that’s now passed, and happened a decade ago.”

New identity

Many students aren’t ready to say their goodbye to close companions when they all go home. University prepares young people for transition from adolescence into adulthood but not the realities of working life? Graduate employment rate stands at 82% according to the Office of National Statistics in 2017, so it takes time to secure a fulltime job. So after three years of relative freedom, hordes of students will probably find themselves packing their bags and trundling back home to their parents’ house. Kayleigh says: “I really struggled with that – having a curfew again, not being able to sleep in the same bedroom as my boyfriend, and, I felt, being treated like a child again.”

Kayleigh RattleKayleigh Rattle describes university as combination of indispensable relationships and learning

This feeling of stepping backwards can be an extra incentive to find a “proper job”. Carolyn Mumby, counsellor coach with British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, says: “The return home can feel like trying to squash yourself back into the shape of your previous self. “It can be challenging to maintain your autonomy. “You may be challenging autonomy of your parents and carers who have adjusted to life without you living at home. There is a renegotiation of roles and relationships. Sophie Phillipson, 27, felt “ovewhelmed” and “nervous” at the prospect of facing adult life. She went on to found the website HelloGrads, which offers skills to help ease the transition from education to working life. She says: “You come out with a good degree and then reality hits. And it’s quite difficult because you think you’re going to get a good job, if you don’t, you can become overwhelmed.” Emily Williams, 24, and a Sheffield Hallam graduate, took a job that was really disappointing. She says she used to walk to work every day and think: “How can I get slightly injured, not enough to be seriously hurt or die, but just enough so I don’t have to go to work?” She suggests people take time to find out what they want to do. “There is absolutely no shame in going back home and getting a job at your local supermarket whilst you figure out what your passions are,” she says. “Don’t feel like you should already know what you want to do.”

Julie and Sophie PhillipsonSophie Phillipson, and her mother, Julie, set up website HelloGrads to help other young people transition from university into adult working life

Sophie says: “There’s a lot more to consider than you first think – and nobody tells you. “Money is constantly on your mind and there is a huge pressure to succeed from your parents, even though they have the best intentions.”

‘Blagging it’

Student fees tripled in 2012 and Sophie believes this has a part to play in the pressure students place on themselves to succeed and make their degree “worth it.” Social media doesn’t help. “No-one posts the countless rejections they faced to get to their position,” Sophie says. But it isn’t all doom and gloom. Graduates are still likely to be employed than people with fewer qualifications. Claire says that although leaving university was tough, 12 years on she is settled, has a family of her own and a successful business. She believes young people shouldn’t expect working life to be like university. But should “embrace new challenges, because your next adventures are just beginning.” Emily seconds this and says: “No-one has a clue what they’re doing. People in their 30s tell me they don’t feel like proper adults yet. “Everyone is going with the flow and blagging it as they go.”